making waffles

A few weeks ago, while browsing craigslist, I found an ad for a normal sounding dude living in the dells who wanted someone to hang out with.
I figured, well what the hey! Why not! He didn't say anything about just looking for a no strings attached friends sort of deal, and a picture of his penis wasn't included, so it seemed pretty legit.
Well, I messaged him, and didn't hear anything back for a bit, but it didn't really surprise me, but then I did. and he seemed cool. And after a little bit he told me to text him cuz it would just be easier.
Well, he seemed like a nice guy. and then while we where texting he asked me something facebook couldn't tell him about me, so I mentioned that I really liked turtles, and OMG. HE HAS 2 PET TURTLES.
Well, He's pretty smart too. This is how I know:

1. I told him to come to Vintage, and he did.
2. He talked to everyone.
3. He didn't fall off the step when he left, (sure sign a guys no good).
4. He was like the coolest guy ever.
5. He thinks my Bear drawing is funny.
6. He graduated college!
7. He has pet turtles.

After he left, he asked me if I would come watch a movie at his house. And this seemed ok. (I am pretty sure that "watch a movie" is guy code for something else though) And then he asked me if I was going to get on the bed so we could make out or what.
Well, you don't have to ask me twice! I know, I told Lacey upon leaving that I had no intention of finding out what his penis looks like, but well, I did find out. And I know he said he didn't want to move fast, but we went from meeting to making out to naked in a matter of hours. But, Seriously! He's a total babe!
It's so weird, he's so nice! I never knew that fooling around could last more than 6 minutes, that not all boys taste like cigarettes, that afterward someone would cuddle and not hand me clothes back and go outside to smoke a cigarette, that taking a shower in the worlds smallest shower stall would be fun, or that it's ok to say what I want and what I don't like.
And the best thing is, everyone at Vintage likes him. Cortney told me not to fuck this up. Lacey told me not to break his heart,( let's get this straight, i don't break hearts, I just am to nice to boys that just aren't right!)
So we made waffles, on the second day (I know, I'm an easy slut. Whatever). I can say it was good-ish. I think I'll be a bit more relaxed if I've had a drink or two. I mean this time it was legit first time (I would tell you why but then you'd get grossed out.) So, basically, I'm pretty dang happy on cloud nine right now. I want to flaunt my bite marks to the loser who ditched me, and take him to the resturat the bitch works at and show him off. Call me crazy, but it's good to know that super awesome dudes are out there. cuz, he is most likely the coolest one I've met!

xo-K

a little venting about how i don't ever understand boys

so, i was seeing a guy for a bit. and then just one day he stopped talking to me. but i was just like, ok. and i went on with my life. well, he just so happens to work with my best friend. and one night, he was talking to her about stuff, and she said she's surprised he cry. and then I had the genius idea to drunk text him. I don't think it was that smart when you get the "who is this and stop texting me" text. So, don't worry. Point taken. But, it still leads me to wonder WTF MATE! Don't go saying one thing to one person, then be a complete fucking asshole. Sure, it wasn't the best idea to drunk text him, Or let jessika call him and tell him that he should put his penis in my mouth. But, you don't have to be a fucking asshole about it. OR! Better yet, Just tell me what I did to make you hate me. xo- k

Strange how it happens :: Sometimes

I have met a boy. Well he's not really a boy. He's 31. He works with the great Lacey, that's how I met him. And he asked her about me, and I said it would be ok if she gave him my number. And she did. And he texted me. Then we talked a bunch, then we hung out. I didn't mean for it to go that far, I honestly only hoped we'd kiss a little, but somehow, all my clothes came off. A few nights later, he took me on a date. A REAL, grown up date. Like, he paid for it all! No one has ever done that for me! And then we didn't even mess around! I was fully expecting to give a little bit up, but all he did was kiss me goodnight! And then we hung out again, and it didn't take long for me to want to be naked. And then I decided, I want to make waffles with this boy. But sadly, I haven't gotten to hang out with him in daysssssss. But tonight, I stopped to see him at his work, and he hooked my friend up with Dippin' Dots, and some slushie, and he gave me a drink FO FREE. And when he did that, it made me like him a little bit more, and I can not wait to make waffles with him. ASAP. Call me crazy, but it's the little things that make me like him. And I'm sure I'll be posting something soon about Kendall's First Waffles! xo -k

Cloud 9::More than a Salon

I know, it's lame. I always write about a cool dude, and then it a few weeks later, I write about how much I hate him. But I am going to do it again. Oh he is cool! I can't even tell you how cool. Like normally, I am so nervous to talk to dudes on the phone, but when he called me, I wasn't nervous. And It wasn't that awkward, even when we weren't saying anything, It didn't seem that awkward to me at least. Or maybe it could be the fact that it was 1am... And I don't know, but something about him, has given the me self confidence to think I am a total babe. I got a mini skirt and HIGH heels, oh but I do think I look delicious in them, or at least I am thinking that when I slip on those heels. He is more than willing to return the favor, if I send a naughty picture, you can be sure I get one back, and he's not always pestering me to take off my clothes, and you can be sure that if I do, his are normally coming off too. I believe what he says. And before, I've gotten way nervous when guys compliment me, but not really when he does. I am trying this new thing called playing it cool, maybe this has something to do with it. He's funny. He's into photography. He's outgoing. He's passionate. He's responsible for a great amount of fun I've had between the hours of 1am and 5am. A back, when I met up for dinner with another dude, and Jeff thought he was cool, and Lacey said "No Jeff, Kendall needs a boy that can keep up with her." And call me crazy, but this dude, I'm pretty sure, can keep up with me. And I think I can learn a lot from him, in all sorts of ways. xo K

5 Great Ideas

So, I've spent a lot of time, trying to be someone that boys will like. But I have realized, I don't want to change. I like myself. But I did happen to stumble upon an article in Cosmo about how when girls work there, they often end up engaged and married soon after. Well, I was intrigued. I do not want to be engaged, but I do like good advice when it comes along, and I think these tips help out a lot

Lesson 1- Guys love being off the hook. Basically don't pressure them so much. Don't worry about if this dude is going to be your boy friend, or a boy that's your friend. Just let it happen. When it's right, you'll both know.

Lesson 2-Guys live in the present. Never act all wifey to show that you'll be perfect. Who is planning that far ahead?! Have fun, party, go out, try new things. Who know's what'll happen

Lesson 3-Guys like to be liked. No matter his little quips, don't freak out about them. Unless it's one that you can't stand. (like he plays multiplayer computer games for hours or something that is not cool.) If a guy compliments you or dresses different or just wants to hang out, just roll with it! It's who he is!

Lesson 4- Guys like independent chicks. This is my favorite, DO WHAT YOU WANT. Don't sit around waiting for him to call, don't change plans just for him, do what you want. Guys want what they can't have. But don't make them feel like it's unattainable. And don't be a tease all the time!

Lesson 5-Guys love being admired. Of course us ladies do to, but don't be afraid to tell him how rad he is, or how you got lucky to be admired by such a hottie, or how you envy his lifestyle! It makes him, feel just as good as it makes you feel when he tells you such things.

So, I am taking this to heart. I'm just going with the flow, I'm not over thinking anything, I'm going to do what I want. This week, I had the chance to hang out with a dude (sure it wasn't that good of an idea most likely) but it was the first time in a LONG time I was going to do what I wanted to and I wasn't going to over think it! But then he cancelled :( But it makes me feel good that it was the first time, I wouldn't have done what everyone else wanted me to do.

Keep this in mind.

It's been working GREAT for me in the recent days!

xo-K

the boys every girl has

The Good Guy-He's always there, and he'll always listen. He doesn't force you to do anything you don't want to do. In fact he's just all around good. From my experiences, he won't make a move. The Friend-He's just that a Friend. I know, I know. We have a blog about how boys and girls can't be just friends, but in all honesty they kind of can. I can't be someone you just met, it's someone you've known for ages. And he's pretty rad, I mean cooler than your own brother. You share some common interests and can partake in them. The Bad Influence/Dirty Boy-He makes you step out of your comfort zone and do things you would have never imagined doing. Naughty things, like phone sex or mailing your panties to him. You probably have nothing in common with him, other than your lust for one another, and he's a douche bag. The Totally Untouchable Crush-He works across the street, lives next door, the next office over, runs in the park the same time as you. He just won't have a thing to do with you, or any of the total vixens you work with. So you have to just be content admiring him from afar, like a total stalker. But it's ok, He makes you realize even the nicest girls don't get what they want. The One That Got Away-Of course, there will always be one boy in your life that got away. Maybe more than one. You might have pushed him away (becuase you thought he would like you enough to fight harder to keep you), or he might have just left you to always wonder "what if..." The First Love-You met him and fell for him, you changed so much for him, and you were in love. He was your whole world. But slowly that world fell apart and your burning desire to please him more or less became a desire to burn him. You still think about him, and you'll always love him, but there's a difference between being in love and loving him. The True Love-You will just know when you've met your true love. you will hate him at times, but then you'll remember how much he means to you. He's perfect, he's nice to you, your friends, small children and small animals. And you might say you hate him, but honestly your friends know different!

passion

I've been thinking a lot. And ya know what I want more than anything? Passion. I want someone to show me, that they are passionate. If I'm so fricking awesome, like they say, then it shouldn't be so hard to show it. And if you think about, how many times have you had the kind of passion they have in movies?? I had it once. And it's sad, but it was just with a guy I met in a bar. Then he made me believe it would happen again but then he just stopped talking to me. Whatever, it's cool, Aniello. I understand you've just been through a 'gang of drama', so don't make some innocent girl feel like a complete and utter waste in the wake of your 'issues'. I know you're a busy guy, but honestly, I wanted to make the time. [now i feel better! well a little....] So once again how come it's always seeming to be me that has to make the move? Why can't a guy just do it. Make the move, ya know grab a girl by the elbow and pull her against you and have your way with her. And another thing is, if, you really like a girl as much you say, then shouldn't you try harder to keep her than most boys do?? Aren't you crazy to let go of someone that you say means that much to you?? Deep down, I believe in romance and all that good stuff, it's just sad that no one has ever made me feel like I am good enough for it. And all these boys say it, but no one ever does it. Sometimes, it's hard to walk in a single girls shoes. That's why we need really special shoes :) xo, K

to all the boys who may love me and/or lust after me

dear men who like me, I am greatly honored that you have shown interest in me! I am not that used to getting attention from men, but please don't lie to me. Please don't tell me that you need me in your life, and then not talk to me for days. Please if you really do like me, come see me. Don't make me just wonder. And the door swings both ways. I would totally come to you if you want me too. Please don't lie to me. It just breaks me. I don't really trust guys but if I do tell you I trust you, don't lie to me even more. Please, if you don't want to talk to me anymore, just tell me. Don't leave me hanging/wondering if your dead in a ditch somewhere. How hard is it to just say "hey babe, gonna be busy today, but i'll text you later." Please keep in mind, that I don't want to be a virgin forever. Please, I'm not demanding, I'm not a bitch, I'm a pretty normal girl! with love, Kendall Please

bad boy vs good guy

Why is it that women tend to prefer 'bad' boys compared to 'good' guys?

We've all done it at one time or another in our dating synopsis. Hell, we might have even chosen the bad guy over the good one, and hell, we probably even knew what we were doing.

No questions about it.

Bad Boy

yum.

Good Guy

yum.

Now. From experience...I've dated a few bad guys and a few good guys. And while they both have their own ups and downs, you should probably go for good guys in the end.

Bad boys tend to go more for one night stands and ditzy blondes. Very stereotypical, I know. But we live in a world ran by stereotypes. Truth.

And the truth hurts, but I dont see nerdy dudes tearing girls' hearts out and feeding them to the dogs. Do you? I mean you have a few exceptions here and there, but overall, no.

But girls tend to be shallow from time to time, and shit happens, and you find the guy with the bad ass tattoos and spiked hair to be smokin hot. And one thing may lead to another, and then he doesn't call you. And stops communication all together, and it wasnt you, it was him speech, and this and that. And he's feeding your heart to the dogs on a silver platter.

So ladies. We need to look past all that hair gel and ink and bad ass-ness, and go for whats important.

Someone who will make us truly happy.

This is a little harder than you think. But if you're patient, it will happen. Let fate run it's course. And if you wanna date a few bad dick heads along the way, feel free. But don't forget to give the good guys a chance too...

I prefer nerds myself =]

Live Long and Prosper.

Marry me Zachary Quinto. K thanks

xoxo,

l

I've Stopped Believin'

So a few weeks ago, I met this terribly awesome guy. But now, I haven't heard from him in about week. He told me some cool stuff. And I thought he meant it. He told me he couldn't wait to run into me again. And he enjoyed what we did just as much as I did. And this is the one that got me all hung up on him "U make me feel good. I've just been thru a gang of drama. I can't stop thinking about u. I think ur blog got me sprung." If he's done with me. Fine. Just let me know so I don't keep going on like a dumbass. So my moral basically is, if you don't like someone like they like you, just tell them! god. It's not that hard especially in a text message. I just really thought he was different. And to think I was combing over the idea of making waffles with him! ha. xx-K

I used to be cynical

I used to be very cynical when a guy told me I was beautiful and all that jazz. I used to be a bitch about it. But then I realized even if he says it to a zillion and one girls, it is still pretty special to hear it. I have recently met a guy. And he tells me all the good stuff, and I know he might just be bs-ing me, but at the same time, I wonder "why would he waste his time telling me this stuff?" I know it might all end just as soon as it started, and I know I will be sad if it does. But while it's happening. I plan on living it up. hardcore. I mean, I have never really gotten to a know a guy like him, and I can't wait to know more about him. But if he doesn't want to share I am ok. If he doesn't want to meet me again. I am ok with it. I might be mad, but I will just be disappointed. Becuase I really do lookforward to knowing him. xo-K

I am a Vixen

Vixens don't stalk boys. We hunt them. See, Like, Go Get. It its that easy. It is generally frowned upon to do this in daily settings (work, wal-mart, mall, school) But the bar scence is a totally different story. Boys don't choose you, you pick them

Don't!

• sit/stand at the bar.
• underdress.
• wear something short.

Do!

• Mingle.
• Smile.
• Look Good.
• Have your own style.

And when you see one you like, go over, give him a compliment (I have had recent success with "I like your glasses!") and the rest will just happen.

*if it doesn't, then he likes boys.

Happy Hunting

xo-K

the tale of two encounters.

Something amazing happened this weekend. It all started last week, when my facebook friend/dirty text partner told me he was coming through the Dells next week, and we should meet up. I kinda freaked out a little, I mean, I am pretty insecure about my self, so I don’t want to get shot down anymore than I already do, but anyway. I decided it would be cool to meet him. But then Thursaday night, we closed work and went to get some drinks. So I was feeling pretty darn good about myself, when he said he was by Hotel Rome. (OMG!) not far from where I was.

He came and met Lacey and Tati and Jeff because we were all hanging out on the corner. Well, we know that the end of Vintage is near, and I always wanted to mess around with a guy in the boudoir in back. So I knew, this was my chance. I unlocked the door, and in we went. We kissed some and I asked him if he wanted a blowjob, and like any guy, he said yes. So I did it. It was my first one ever. I am 22 years old, and I gave my first bj to a 18 year old. But it’s cool. He is the kind of boy that I was simply obsessed with in High School, so hick it gets me a little excited. It wasn’t that bad. I don’t know why so many girls hate it. Afterwards, I felt sexy and confident. And good. He finished, and I asked if he was done, and then I told him I wanted to go to a movie with my friends. We left Vintage and he told me to text him. I locked the door and went to find Lacey and Tati. Little did I know, they had snuck into Vintage, and where in a dressing room the whole time. But, creeping is caring!

He needs more practice kissing, but I probably do too, and I feel a lot weird about it because he didn’t say anything the entire time. I don’t even know if I was doing it right, but how many ways are there to do that? But he texted me, not even 10 minutes later. So, I am guess that is a good thing.

Saturday night, I went out to Marleys (<3) And was dirty dancing with this guy. Like really dirrrrrty dancing. Then the place was closing and I pulled out my phone and asked for his number and sent him a naughty picture. He asked to come back to my hotel. (hello, not staying at one!) and I asked his name, and I think he said Cy, but I am not sure. I know I told him my name was Barbie. Well, then when I got back to where I was staying he texted me and asked if he could come over. I told him I wasn’t going to have sex with him. He texted back and said that I can’t expect him to be nonchalant when I let him do that, but he would settle for a backrub. After some discussion with Tati, I decided to let him come here. I met him downstairs, and I had to walk across the street to get my blanket and pillow out of my car. While we were walking across the street, we made out on the bridge to the parking lot. Then we came back upstairs and he told me I was beautiful. And we were making out, and he took off my shirt, and was playing with my boobs, and such and then next thing I know the lights where off, and I was giving him head. He made noise and told me I was phenomenal. I don’t know if he was that drunk, or I am that good. So, then he finished finally, and I thought, what have I done?

He has a picture of a kid on the background of his phone! Then to make matters worse, he texted me the next morning because he forgot his hat and wanted to come and pick it up. So, there I was sitting outside waiting to see what this dude looked like post-morning after. He texted me and said asked where I was. I told him and saw one guy walking up the street…and it was him. He said thanks babe. Then left.

I texted him and asked him one question. How old are you, he said 31. Omg. I did stuff with a 31 year old guy, who has a picture of a kid on his cell phone, and I don’t even know what his name is. After him, I felt dirty.

But Hot Kevin did say he wants to meet again…

Meeting boys on the internet.

This is a good idea if you are too shy to meet them in real life.

Boys there just plainly tell you how beautiful you are and how bad they want to fuck you. And lets face it, who tells you that in real life? No one.

That’s why I applaud Craig from Warped Tour. He just walked up to Lacey and said “You’re beautiful.” That’s it! Then we talked a little bit more and it was just a little awkward. And then him and Lacey shared an awkward hug. Nothing more they didn’t exchange phone numbers or myspaces or any of that crap. It was just plain simple stuff that we want to hear.

But back to this online boy stuff…

It’s a good idea to meet people. But no one likeable (for me at least) lives in these parts. And the boys that I do meet and REALLY like, and seem to like me back live in far distant lands like, Missouri and Indiana and Georgia.

See here, I found this boy, and his name was Jeff, and he was the cat’s meow. I called him the Right Jeff as not to confuse him with the other Jeffs in my life, who were all wrong. And then we texted all the time, and he wanted me to come visit. But I couldn’t and he wouldn’t come here. I see this as a red flag. Then I asked if I could bring a friend and he said No. Red Flag numero two! Well, he told me all the stuff that no one has ever told me before, like how beautiful I am, and I how I am ther perfect match for him, and the list goes on and on. Then he didn’t text me for weeks it was probally like 6 days, but I looked at his myspace and all the comments from girls and how much they love him, bothered me. So I was ready to be done!

I turned 22, and started the week with a whole new outlook on life. And then, while shopping for the perfect birthday outfit, He texted me. It was like the world stopped spinning as I looked down at the text that simply said “i miss you”. After an simply conversation I didn’t text hi all night. And I got REALLY drunk. He didn’t even cross my mind as I was celebrating the big deuce.

When I was writing about the perfect girl, I texted all the boys and asked them what the perfect girl was like. He said “the one I am dating.” Once again the world stopped spinning and I didn’t know if he was serious or messing with me to see what I would say back. But then I realized, He told me all the things I wanted to hear, but it was the same thing he whispered in every other girls ear.

I am done with him. I texted him and said “can you do me a favor” nothing…all morning. So I sent “obviously it’s not a hard favor. Just delete me and forget about me.” Nothing. That was 2 days ago, and I have felt A-FRICKING-MAZING ever since. The only thing I wish is that he would have responded to me. Because now I have a feeling, that I will get a text in a week when he has no one better to text. And I am going to tell him off.

So the moral of this story is, Don’t online date/have a long distance relationship. I mean it’s cool and all if you can trust each other, but one thing he said will stand out to me, and should have stopped me from falling head over heels for him. He said “I like you so much it scares me, because I think you could be as bigger of a player as I am.” But in the end I was a player, I had two boys that I really liked and told them that often.

So basically, I will try not to fall head over heels for any boys in the near future.

xo-K

Happiness

I know you'll read this. And you may be upset that I didn't bring this to you first. And I'm okay with that. Finally I'm okay with that. I've been tip-toeing around your emotions, holding things back, because I didn't want to do anything to upset you, in fear that that may be the last time I would ever talk to you. But I can't live life like that. I need you to know. You say you care, but you have things going on in your life right now. Okay. I get it. [I'm blonde, not mentally challenged]. You say you mean/meant everything you say/said. And you're not sure why I find it so hard to believe. Now I know why I find it unbelievable. Soulmate: Noun; Verb; The first time you glimpse at each other you are immediately drawn to each other, extremely different than ever recognizing anyone you have ever met before. You already know them, feel who they are. Then you speak and realize this is the most amazing person you have ever met and you feel unnaturally comfortable with them. Instead of wanting to know the "basics" about them it is like meeting an old friend you haven't seen in ages and it is time to catch up. This is the person you have been searching for. In that moment the longing stops but you don't realize until you are forced to be apart. This person completes you on a spiritual level and anything could happen, good or bad, one look in their eyes brings a smile to your face and peace to your heart. Suddenly everything you have worked for in your life becomes clear and the path you were unsure of following is now being lit for the both of you to follow. All your fears vanish and you no longer question your purpose in life because together the purpose evolves on its own. You find their insecurities as parts of their soul you need to heal. Mutual understanding and respect. Days filled with laughter. Even if you are sitting next to each other, touching each other, it still feels like they are miles away because that person could never be close enough yet at the same time it feels like you are melting together and your spirits are dancing. I know it's lengthy. But this is what a soulmate (I doubt I could even define it better myself, in my own words) is. This is what I experienced... This is not how you feel. And now I realize this. Why am I waiting for you, when you can't or simply won't do the same for me. This makes me seem mentally challenged. This proves how 'blonde' I can be. I want to remain your friend. But now I know we may never possibly be more than that. And I can finally say I'm okay with that. I'm okay to be really good friends with you...We had a good run while it lasted, right? We made eachother happy when we could. But life happens, and people change. [Change in short amounts of time apparently]. I believe you may have found true happiness somewhere else, and now I'm going to try and do the same. xo

The other girl

What do you do when you find yourself in the predicament of being the 'other girl' The 'other girl' meaning that the dude you're hooking up with has a gf, and you're the one on the side. Well if you know that you're the other girl from the get-go, then that's a different story. I was the other girl once, and it made me feel like shit. I mean I know that the guy must not have really liked his current girl if he was willing to cheat on her with me...but still. I felt like poop. I absolutely hate cheaters, and by being the other girl, I was aiding to the cheating. Pretty much making me a cheater too. Not cool ladies. Not cool. You might say to yourself "Well that's his problem not mine." And you are soooo right. It is his problem, but at the same time, you are sooo wrong. I'm just going to be honest with you ladies... This guy has no intention of ever dating you! What he's doing is wrong. He has the best of both worlds...has a girl who likes him in a commitment and a girl on the side who he has no attachments to. Oh, and I doubt that you're the only 'other girl' at the moment. Put yourself in his girlfriends shoes...how would you feel if you were in her situation? Exactly. You need to get yourself out of that situation ASAP, and run far away from this player douche bag. Ugh. Guys feel some sort of need to get as many girls as possible. I have yet to find out why. But I'm pretty sure they like to feel good about themselves and whatnot...and half the time are compensating for something they don't have or something they're not getting somewhere else. So how do you get out of this situation? Simple. Stop talking to him, OR tell him "LEAVE ME THE FUCK ALONE YOU DOUCHE!" See. Simple. And if you feel like getting even (which I would) I would tell his current girlfriend EVERYTHING. Let's see how much more ass he'll be getting after that. huh. Poor guy. yours always, L

Post Break-ups

Break ups are so hard to deal with. If you don't have a plan that is. And trust me, I've been through PLENTY of break ups, that I might possibly have a little advice that I could share with you... Now, I'm not an expert or anything, but break ups can go one of two ways: You're doing the breaking up with, or he's breaking up with you. I mean you can always do the mutual thing too, but honestly someone thought of it first, so it falls back into one of the two. -Healthy ways to deal-

• Move on.
• Hang out with your friends. Aka bad ass bitches.
• Take up a hobby to distract you from your ex lover.
• Get a friend with benefits. But DONT get attached to him.
• Work out. It's a proven fact that working out release endorphines which make you feel happy. And hey, you can get a smokin body to make ur ex jealous of. Ha ha. Not healthy. But you'll feel healthy anyway.
• Go to the club. Dance ur hiney off! BUT DO NOT EXPECT TO MEET MR RIGHT THERE. Mr right now hangs out there.
• Listen to up beat music. Cash Cash, Lady GaGa, Cobra Starship, Forever The Sickest Kids.
• Do things that make YOU happy. Things that you normally wouldn't have done when you were with someone else.
• Change up your wardrobe. Try something new. Do a little shopping.
• Do it Yourself.. A lot. If youre anything like me, you'll need to do something to compensate. Go to a porn shop and purchase a nice friend. Anywhere from 20.00-60.00 dollars.
• Ignore calls/texts from your ex. You are SOOOO over him.

-Not so Healthy ways to deal-

• Crying non stop for days.
• Calling his phone private to hear his voice. Come on stalker.
• Checking his facebook. A lot. Noticing how nothing has changed for the past 4 hours. Uck.
• Driving past his house at 4am to make sure he's 'ok' actually to make sure no chicks are at his crib.
• Asking his friends about him constantly. Good way to become a stalker and get a restraing order against you.
• Putting your Coldplay CD on repeat and crying yourself to sleep at night. Or day. Or afternoon.
• Calling/texting him fifteen times in thirty minutes. Let alone in a day. Not cool.
• Overeating, or undereating.
• Becoming an alcoholic. Now binge drinking is one thing. But if youre coming home to crack open a cold one, every night...you need to stop. OR attend AA meetings sista.

Now if youre the one who did the breaking up with, then it's a different story. You should already be over this dude. You're the one who broke up with him. And confusion is not a good basis for any relationship. So just get over it and move on.

Honestly girls, I can guarantee that this guy is already over you and probably has moved on to his next victim. So why waste your time dwelling on the past? There are BILLIONS of people in the world. You'll find youre one sometime somewhere someday. Be patient. Be confident.

xoxo L

What he REALLY means....

Now keep in mind that these are just suggestions, and if you're in a relationship that you feel does not apply to these suggestions...well then good for you. ...When he texts you between the hours of midnight and 6am (this being the only time he texts you): Let's hook up and make waffles. I don't want anything too serious, and don't want you to stay over and cuddle after. ...'You R hot!': I really like the way your body looks and want to see it naked. ...'Youre Beautiful': I think I could see myself with you. ...Wanna come over: Let's ssseeex. ...I had a great time with you tonight, we should go out again sometime soon: He's really into you, but may try to take things too fast, so beware. ...You come here often? : 'Cause I do, and don't want you to spoil my game, by hooking up with you, and potentially seeing you here again. ...Hey Babe/Doll/Sexy: I really don't have that much respect for you, and really just kinda wanna talk a little maybe sexual to you. Maybe. ...When they use one letter/word texts...chances are they're trying to get rid of you. The 'K' text clearly points that out. By not leaving anything left to converse about, they're really just trying to get rid of you. ...When you're talking to a guy about an important subject and you're trying to look him into the eyes, and he gives you an answer and looks away...chances are he's lying to you. I believe this one to 100% true, it hasn't failed me yet. They feel ashamed for lying, and therefore cannot look you in the eyes, so they look away. ...'Dude': You've officially entered the buddy stage. Good luck getting out of that one. ...You're such a good friend: And that's ALL you'll ever be to him. No getting out of that one. ...Any kind of open ended question shows that this guy is potentially interested, and wants to get to know more about you. Which is a good thing. ...When he hugs you and pats you on the back: Good 'ol buddy. I will add more later.

boys=happines?

Someone told me this once.."you're one of those girls that needs a boy at all times to be happy." Is it a boy that makes us happy or the idea of a boy? Well. I would like to think it's a little of both, but it's hard to say. At times, I like having a boyfriend, but maybe i'm more happy that I can actually say I have one. Maybe I dont really care to have this so called boyfriend. Maybe that's why relationships tend to fail, and move along too quickly. You just get so wrapped up in the idea of the relationship instead of the things itself. I don't think i am a girl who needs to have a boy in her life to make her happy. I mean boys have made me happy before, sure. I can honestly say that. But I don't need to continuously have to remain happy. I just like to continuously have one. =] These are known facts: *you can't cuddle with yourself. *you can't make waffles with yourself..sure, sure..you can DIY, but not the same. *you can't kiss yourself. *you can't hold your own hand without looking like a weirdo. *you can't dirty text yourself. *you can't stare into your own eyes and get lost. *you can't give yourself butterflies. *you....well you get the point. While all these things may make you feel happy, there are alternatives. So am i going to go clinically depressed and psycho if i do not have a boy? pshhh no! and no girl should base her sole existence on someone of the opposite sex. that's just an absurd and ridiculous idea. be a strong, independent woman, and if some dude happens to come along...well so be it. but don't seek happiness through a penis. Make yourself happy. and worry about the rest later. Oh, and someone once said that I didn't have much of a personality either. HA. look how wrong he was on that. xxox, L

Flirtexting

Dos and Donts of Flirtexting As you can probably already assume, Flirtexting is when you flirt through texts. There is also Sexting, which is dirty texts. But that's a whole different blog that I think I'll leave up to Kendall to write. She has more experience with that =] I've came up with a list of things that you should and shouldn't do when you first get a dude's number or first give him yours. Dos * Do text him within a reasonable amount of time after you recieve his 7. Send him a friendly hello within the first couple days of getting his digits. Introduce yourself and keep it classy. * Do get to know him. Ask him about himself. And tell him about yourself. * Do send smile faces and winks when it's appropriate. --> =] my personal fav * Do compliment him without coming off as a whore. Simple things like: you looked way cute today.... ;) * Do ask him out over a text. That way you can avoid all the awkwardness that you can sometimes come across during a face to face conversation. (some dudes would prefer to be asked out in person though, so idk, use your best judgement) * Do text him after a date, and tell him thank you. Even if you plan on never going out with him again. A simple thank you is okay. If you plan on seeing him again...."thanks for the great time tonight..cant wait 2 see you again =] " * Do text him daily. Even if it's a simple Good Morning ;) or Hey, how are you? If he doesn't wanna text back, then he won't. * Do have fun when texting him. * Do send him classy pics if he asks for one. With your face in the pic and a nice smile. Sexting would include a boob shot. Not flirtexting. Keep it clean. Don't come off easy. :) * Do tell him you miss him making you smile. :) Dont's * Don't talk about sex within the first week of meeting this dude. You will come off as a hooker whose just looking to score. If that's the case then you should be sexting, not flirtexting. * Don't confess your undying love towards them...right away. =] You'll most likely come off as desperate, and I hear that's a major turn off. * Don't text one word texts. This is annoying and unnecessary. You might as well not even text them then, or waste your time. * Don't use lol after EVERY single sentence. It's okay to lol often, but not too often. or even l(ing)mao is okay too. * Don't talk about serious serious issues while flirtexting. Nothing too personal either. Im sure dude doesn't care about your last period, or the fact that you're having mixed feelings about your sexuality. * Don't go long periods without texting..or even calling...him. It's okay to play 'hard to get', but don't play 'so hard you'll never get me'. * Don't bitch and bitch about something to him. Chances are he could care less anyway. And you're going to send him running. * Don't go overboard and hound him with texts. * Don't send forwards. Period. They're lame and useless. And come off as being childish or having no life. * Don't resend the text more than twice if he's not responding. If he's not getting after sending it twice, then he's simply 'not getting it.' Use these as guidelines. Of course each guy is going to be different, but it's up to you to use your best judgement sweety. Oh, and I would like to point out that I spoke with a dude to collaborate this list. So it's pretty legit =] He also said it was okay to use cutesy nicknames with him. But idk. I think that was just that guy in general. lola (laught out loud alot), =] L