After I brought the magazine home and reread the article, I highlighted the 'important' parts that stood out to me. Those parts in this article inspired me to write this blog you are about to read. And I'm dying to buy the actual book and read that for myself.
Now as young females, we tend to think that we are...well, goddesses, for lack of better words..that we are strong, independent, and that nothing can hold us back. And why should we let some guy hold us down and try and 'interfere' with our lives."We'd rather be alone for the right reasons.."
I am/was guilty of this kind of thinking. Sure, I would go on dates and casually date boys here and there..but I was never looking for any real type of commitment. I mean because the idea of being with one certain person for the rest of my life, didn't make much sense to me. Hell, it even scared me.. Nowadays you don't see many people stay together for the long haul...Divorce rates are through the roof and promiscuous sex is an every day occurance...the real kind of love is nowhere to be found. And in our heads (as we're casually dating) we're thinking that we'll probably meet our soulmate someday..but if it doesn't actually happen, you'll be okay. You'll be able to deal.
But we never think that it may never happen. Most people are not strong enough to come to terms with this kind of thinking. We're too stubborn to take a step back and look at the bigger picture. "..so we took this idea of being self-sufficient and not depending on anybody, and applied it to our romantic lives."
Now I am definitely not trying to belittle the female race, in any way. I am only trying to help you understand. Understand why so many people are alone and without love in their lives.
Ladies, we're being too picky.
Now, before you rush off to conclusions...hear me out.
Have you ever been guilty of not going on a date with a guy because of a little imperfection he may have? For example: he has bushy eyebrows, his front tooth is weird, he has little feet, he's not 6 foot tall, he has blue eyes instead of green, he doesn't wear name brand clothing, he plays video games, etc, etc...I know each and every one of us are guilty of this. At some point in your life you turned down a guy before you actually got to know him, just because something was 'off.'
Ladies, why do we tend to focus on the negative things about a person, rather than the positive. And we all know that this can go both ways, unfortunately. And guys can be the ones who are pointing out the flaws in someone...but for now, we're taking a step back and focusing on ourselves. As I've said before, if you can't be honest with yourself, then who can you be honest with?
..So why do we always focus on the negative things about someone? I wish I could answer this question. We were probably raised that way. Let's face it, there tends to be more negative things in the world, rather than positive. But, that's no excuse for our actions...
This article also brought up the point that our friends may have cause to dilemma. What are friends for? Well I know that as a friend, I try to be there for my fellow friends and give them support whenever it's needed. And sometimes I may give them too much support, and at times, may fill their head full of compliments. I know that some of my friends definitely do this to me as well. I'm not saying that it's a bad thing. I'm just saying, that we have such big heads from our friends telling us how great we are, that sometimes we tend to think we're perfect. And if this guy isn't perfect like us, then he has no chance in hell at getting past first base.
Now, don't get me wrong. I am not saying that you shouldn't have standards for your sig other. Because standards are always a must. And I am definitely not saying that you should marry someone that you meet on myspace. I am simply saying, give love a chance. How can love flourish, if your cutting it off before it even gets the chance to grow? I am saying, that if youre wondering why you're not finding love out there, maybe its time to take a step back and analyze yourself. Are you setting yourself up to fail?
We are ALL human. And we ALL have flaws and make mistakes. But that's what makes it so great. That's what makes life interesting and fun. All of these flaws and imperfections will only keep you on your toes...only keep you wanting more of your sig other. But if you cant stop being too picky and if you keep pointing out the flaws in someone else, then I don't want to hear you bitch and complain that you haven't found someone that wants to date you. And I dont want to hear you bitch that you're alone. Because chances are that it's your own damn fault. If you're not willing to come to terms with the fact, that we are all humans and no one is perfect, then whatev. Sorry.
Prince Charming doesn't exist. That kind of stuff is left for the Disney movies. That's why they're movies...But Prince Charming does have a brother, and I promise you that he's just as good, if not better than his ridiculously-impossible-standard-brother.
*Disclaimer: I do not want you to sell yourself short. Have standards. But make sure they are realistic and not fantasy like.
xxxo,
L
